Beginners guide to Surviving University 2

Islamic adviceUni is literally buzzing with Fitnah, from the people who go there to some of the buildings and books in the library. It’s used as an excuse to propagate false ideas and brainwash the masses…so there must be a few things to beware of:1. The prayer roomAlthough (generally) the ISOC is not the problem, the prayer room is always buzzing with people with twisted views and next ideologies. You meet Muslims from many different countries and backgrounds which have influenced the way they think and many of these sects and named-groups operate in the prayer room. Some even call to their beliefs and love to argue and will spark the argument with everyone and anyone.Despite this, you meet the most amazing and sincere people you’ll ever meet who really help you in everyway possible. Not everyone who has a slight difference in mentality to yourself is your enemy and Uni is a good platform to verify all the slander you hear about these groups. If you really want to know what they’re upon… just ask them!2. The debatesJust as we’ve mentioned, there are those who really love debating, whether it’s about Islam or worldly things. Some named-groups and sects even debate over things that arenot only out of their own capabilities of understanding as a layman, but also in matters that a Muslim must not go into whether a layman or the greatest scholar. Therefore, it becomes necessary for you to learn your Deen from trusted sources and be sincere in gaining that knowledge. Learn with evidences from the Qur’an and Sunnah as this not only increases your general understanding of Islam but also creates certainty and it certainly eradicates doubt.Also, beware of speaking without knowledge. It’s easy to fall into Shaytan’s trap of disagreeing with someone based upon the fact that they belong to one of these groups or sects and not because you yourself know that. You might be arguing on an issue in which they are correct about and you are wrong.Seeing as everyone in Uni (especially Muslims, sociology, history and philosophy students) begin to act likephilosophers they will be more open to ideas. Alhamdulillah this is a great platform to give Da’wah especially collectively, like writing forthe student magazines or entering writing competitions and relating it to Islam, its merits and Muslims and their positive impact upon the world. Many Muslims do this and win essaycompetitions and have their articles publicised; it really does work!3. The Pubs, etcDon’t be fooled by the fact that some Muslims hang-out in the pubs staying away from drinking alcohol only playing pool, snooker, table-football and other such activities. Stay away from the pubs and clubs otherwise there’s no doubt that eventually you will either start to ‘loosen up’ in established matters of Islam or maybe even reject it and commit Kufr (disbelief).4. The libraryThe more philosophical the subjects are at your Uni are, the more ‘random’ the library materials are. Recently I found the whole set of Salman Rushdie’s books including ‘Satanic Whispers’ and even more recently I found a shockingly western-biased account on Islamic Spain. Much of the books and History are anti-Islamic although weare now seeing a slow emergence of Muslim writers being recognized in the west and having their works published and put into the bookshelves of Universities. Know your religion with certainty; make sure you are grounded in Islam if youbother with such books.I hope that this advice helps but again I recommend you to the advice of the people of knowledge and the Islamic Societies. They know how to help and go out of their way to do so. You can also go Uni for the lectures and do your work at home. Make the most of all that’s available to you and enjoy your time there. It really does open up your mind and isn’t as bad as some people say.May Allah (swt) raise your rank and bless you in this world and the next and may He (swt) change our condition for the better and allow us to be the forerunners in this blissful task, Ameen!

Beginners guide to Surviving University 1

Source: As-Sabiqoon Monthly Magazine Issue 9 Sept 2006Before you is a concise step-by-step guide about surviving at Uni! All I write is based upon my very own experience which has advice in dealing with it life at Uni. It’s worth noting that (as I write) I am a first year and in no way have I experienced all the problems, and due to the nature of the problems mentioned, my advice is not the only advice available. I recommend you to stick to the advice of the scholars and students of knowledge; in other words, it’s just an introduction into surviving the first year! It’s split into two main sections: general advice (which includes advice on handling the workload itself) and Islamic advice, which highlights the main problems faced by every Muslim what to do should in these positions.General adviceStep1: know your role!The first step is to actually understand why you are at Uni and what you want to get out of it. Whether you want to go to Uni or you’re being forced to go, make sure you have aims and objectives and actually work towards it. Have an idea of what field (roughly) you wish to go into. Carefully study the course description and individual module description so that you know what to expect and what you should achieve at the end. If you don’t like it, it’s not too late to switch courses or individual modules. Many students switch within the first semester (term)and the Universities expect this.Step two: your surroundings!As soon as you start Uni, it’s important that you have a good circle of pious Muslim friends- also maybe non-Muslim friends whom you can give Da’wah to. SubhanAllah, this is so important as you’ll find within a few weeks the majority of non-muslim students heading to the pubs and clubs drinking a few pints and then heading off to the library to do some work. Alhamdulillah many Unis havean ISOC and a dedicated prayer room where you’re more then welcome! In fact, ISOCs have a dedicated group to bring people to the prayer rooms and also start off their talks and Jumua’h Khutbah with short and sweet Naseeha (advice) regarding surviving Uni. Theprayer room should be your refuge without distracting you from your purpose to work; so make sure you have good friends, be a regular prayer room user and have a separate place to study.Step three: do your work!It’s really easy to be distracted from doing your work. Many students suffer from the whole Uni-cliche lifestyle of going out, partying, having ‘fun’ and plenty of brothers and sisters organise events or invite you to eat with them at restaurants. It’s very easy to just give up and leaveyour work for later and join them, though quite frankly, if you don’t do your work, you will fail! Uni is very independent and it’s up to YOU to commit yourself. I found that dedicating the day for work and evening for maybe extra/remaining work and going out worked best; make a schedule try stick to it!Step four: Do your bestBe sincere in what you do; do it to help Muslims climb the society ladder so that we can have an impacton the world again. Be the best (or one of the best thereafter) in your class so that you have good prospects and also so that you can use your position to give Da’wah. And it’s not that hard! A few words here and a few there, people will automatically flock to you to ask for help. Just do your best and remember the results is with Allah (swt):‘Be mindful of Allah, you will find Him before you. Get to know Allah in prosperity and He will know you in adversity. Know that what has passed you by was not going to befall you, and that what has befallen you was not going to pass you by. And know that victory comes with patience, relief with affliction, and ease with hardship.’(Imam Tirmizi, Imam An Nawawi’s 40 Ahadith)Step 5: make the most of itIf you have any problems with your work, go to your lecturers and ask forhelp. Don’t be afraid to ask during or after the lectures and don’t pretend tounderstand! If something is explained to you and you still don’t get it, tell them – pound them till you finally get it. If it’s the lecturer you can’t understand then find a PhD student or someone in the same or year above and ask- there’s plenty of them in the Prayer Room.Use the library, Internet, lab sessions,revision classes, etc. Find a few brothers and sisters who have been through the course who can help andsell you their books for proper discount prices. I bought a 40 pounds book off a brother for just 10 pounds…bargain!

Gender Interaction on Campus 2

4. It is well known that both of these women were eligible for marriage with Prophet Mosa. In fact, we know that later he married one of them. Thus, these verses are used to prove that interaction between non-marhams is permitted as long as they observe certain adab which will be explained shortly, inshallah.5. Inter-gender interaction is an exception, not the rule. Meaning that such interaction should take place only under situations which are clearnecessities. The proof is the statement, “Our father is a very old man.” Meaning that Musa (peace be upon him) saw them under severe duress and spoke to them in an effort to remove their hardship, and their response was based on the necessity of getting water to drink. Thus, it can be said, that the call to Islam and its propagation fall under such a necessity however, such work must be done observing the following adab.a. Remember that any encounter involves the eyes, tongue and limbs. However, the most important component for this encounter is the heart. Thus, before any gathering check your heart and make sure that it is with Allah Most High, full of love for Him and in submission to the sunna of the Prophet (may peace andblessings be upon him). A great du’a to say before such a gathering is the following supplication of the Prophet(may peace and blessings be upon him):اللهم مقلب القلوب ثبّت قلبي على دينكAllahumma muqallibul Qulub thabit qalbi ‘ala deenek.“O turner of the hearts! Establish my heart upon Your religion.”b. After one’s heart has submitted and his whims have been crushed, it is logical the rest of his body will follow and this would entail:· Lowering the gaze as everything has an entrance and one of the entrances to the heart is the glance.· Avoid speech or actions which could be taken as flirting. I was told by one of my sheikhs that laughing and joking should be avoided between non-mahram couples. For that reason Allah described the daughter of Shu’ayb, when she approached Mosa, “Then there came to him one of the two women, walking shyly.”· Avoid being alone as Shaytan will be the third amongst you. Try your best to meet as a group as private meetings amongst a brother and sister who are non-mahram are strictly prohibited. In addition, during group meetings there should be a good amount of distance between brothers and sisters.· Observe the correct Islamic dress code and remember to ask yourself an important question. “Am I makingdawa to myself, or to Allah and the call of His beloved (may peace and blessings be upon him)?”· There is no better solution than asking. Thus, it is important to refer any specific questions or issues to local scholars as they are your life source for survival in the campus jungle.I ask Allah to bless our questioner, plant her feet firm upon his obedience and make her a great caller to Allah (may peace and blessings be upon him). I would like to express my gratitude to two of my early Sheikhs, Abu Mustafa of Senegal and Shaykh Abdul Jalil of San-Diego. Most of my humble attempt at an answer came from the questions I asked them while in my university days. May Allah bless them and continue to use them as a source of benefit to the shabab in the West.In need of your prayers and happy Eid,Suhaib D. WebbSource: Sunnipath.com——————————————————————————–[1]Qur’an 9/71[2]Tafsir Al-Tabari, surah 9/71[3]For and excellent Arabic reference on this refer to Sh. Faisal Malwais Darul Mara Fe Al-A’mal Al-Islamiy.”[4]Qur’ana 28/22-25[5]Reported by At-Tirmizi, Ibn Hibban and Al-Hakim graded it Sahih[6]Al-Shawqiyat pg. 193

Gender Interaction on Campus 1

In the name of Allah, Most Compassionate, Most Merciful,The question of gender interaction on campus is one of great importance. Unfortunately, at least inmany cases, it has been handled from one or two extremes. I remember visiting an MSA and finding the entire MSA was shut down because, at the first meeting a brother stood up, pointed at the sisters and said, “Why are they here? It is not allowable for you to be here!”On the other side of the coin I’ve heard of MSA’s who conduct their meetings at Starbucks! Thus, while enjoying the latest frappuccino, Fatima and Zaid are sitting together with no respect for our sacred texts and principles. Insha’Allah, it is our hope to answer this question from the perspective of Islamic activism and dawa using a few very importantverses from the Book of Allah Most High.The Responsibility of Islamic ActivismAllah Most High says:“The believers, men and women, are protecting friends one of another; they enjoin the right and forbid the wrong, and they establish worship and they pay the poor-due, and they obey Allah and His messenger.”[1]Imam Al-Tabari (may Allah be pleased with him) said, commenting on this verse, “They invite humanity toward faith in Allah and His Messenger (may peace and blessings be upon him) and everything that the Prophet (may peace and blessings be upon him) was sent with by Allah.” [2] The scholars have said that, because of the wording of this verse, it is clear that the responsibility of dawa and Islamic work falls upon both males and females.[3]The Scope of Inter-Gender Relations:In Sura Al-Qasas we find a very interesting example of inter-gender relations found in the story of Sayyiduna Musa (peace be upon him).Allah Most High says:“And when he went towards (the landof) Madyan, he said: “It may be that my Lord guides me to the Right Way.”And when he arrived at the water of Madyan he found there a group of men watering (their flocks), and besides them he found two women who were keeping back (their flocks). He said: “What is the matter with you?” They said: “We cannot water (our flocks) until the shepherds take (their flocks). And our father is a very old man.” So he watered (their flocks)for them, then he turned back to shade, and said: “My Lord! Truly, I am in need of whatever good that You bestow on me!” Then there came to him one of the two women, walking shyly. She said: “Verily, my father calls you that he may reward you for having watered (our flocks) for us.”[4]By taking a quick glance at these verses we can garner a number of lessons related to Islamic work, the personality of the Islamic caller and rules and adab for inter-gender relations:1. The importance of d’ua. If we look at this story as large structure, we can see that supplication forms its foundation and roof. Thus, Prophet Musa began his actions with a du’a and completed it. For this reason the Prophet (may peace and blessings beupon him) said, “Nothing is more honorable (most liked) before Allah Most High than Supplication.”[5]2. The great mercy and compassion of the Prophets. Prophet Musa felt compassion for the two women and went to assist them. It is important for the Islamic worker have mercy and concern for those around him. For that reason the poet Ahmed Shawqi wrote:وإذا رحمتَ فأنتَ أمٌ, أو أبٌ هذان في الدنيا هما الرحماء“And if you (Muhammad) implement mercy, then you are a mother or father. And they, in this life, are the exercisers of extreme mercy.”[6]3. The importance of obeying and serving one’s parents: Prophet Shu’ayb’s daughters not only served him in his old age, but obeyed him bycarrying themselves with great fidelity and morality in his absence. The same can be said for the campus. Many of us live away from our parents on campus and it is important to respect them in their absence by being pious and righteous children. It is sad to see many university students drooling at the opportunity to escape to the campus environment just to disobey their parents. However, the truly righteous slaves of Allah obey their parents even in their absence. Of course, this obedience is in the good and not the evil.

Muslim Uni Life? part 2

If we really look at our life we see thateverything is indefinate, getting a job,even living until tomorrow. In fact wecould die anytime, this is a definate, the only dead certain thing in our life.Most of us believe we can make up for our actions later or we can be religious later. We are gambling. Thechances of our dying today are little, but the stakes are high. Allah reminds us of the importance of this,“O you who beleive, obey Allah as he should be obeyed, and die not except in a state of Islam” (Quran3:102)Each of us needs to decide. Is Islam right or not? Why don’t we take the time, just once, once in our lives to find out if Islam is right. Is the Quran from God or not? We can’t see God, but is there a maker to all this? We need to study nature, and the world. We only live once. We shouldn’t go toa club thinking we are only going to ‘hang out and are not doing anything wrong’ then feel guilty about it later. We shouldn’t go on a date or drink, then feel guilty about it, worrying about hellfire.On the Day of Judgement it will be us alone who will be asked about our actions. If we are not following this deen completely, we are injuring our own soul, both in this life and the next.“Verily We have revealed the Book to thee in truth, for (instructing) mankind. He, then that receives guidance beinfits his own soul: but he that strays injures his own soul…” (Quran 39:41)This is the true definition of freedom. To learn about Islam and the world openly. To contemplate about life and death. And after learning the truth, obeying the word of God.“Those on whom knowledge has been bestowed may learn that the (Quran) is the truth from your Lord, and that they believe therein, and their hearts may be made humbly (open)to it…” (Quran 22:54)Once students have this rock-solid intellectual beleif in Islam, the corruptness and falseness of the people around them is clear. The beauty and wisdom of the islamic way, the best alternative is clear. What other’s do is of less importance. If others think they were weird to pray or weird to be honest, they would still pray and still be honest because they know their deen.The Prophet(SAW)’s famous hadith to ‘seeking knowledge is an obligation upon every Muslim’ (Ibn Majah) or to ‘Allah makes the way to Jannah easy for him who treads th path in search of knowledge’ (Muslim) is too often forgotten by students. Our Quran’s are left on the top shelves, gathering dust. Sometimes the most it is read is when someone dies. How is this to help, when the guidance comes too late. The Quran is for the living. The path to understanding and followingIslam comes from learning first.How many of us are Muslim, yet havenever read the Quran in our native language?How many of us are Muslim, yet haveyet to open a book on hadith or sunnah?How many of us defend Islam to non-Muslims, but do not follow it ourselves?May Allah forgive and lead us and allthose lost to the straight path, inshaAllah.Ameen.by Huma Ahmadwww.islambradford.com

Muslim Uni Life? part 1

Freedom. Young people live for the day when they can move out of the house and go to university and finally be free.Freedom from their parents, from restrictions on their lifestyle, from everyone telling them what to do. This is why in university you find a whole generation that does what they want. Life’s short they say, let’s enjoy ourselves while we can.So it goes for Muslims. In university you find the most amazing things, Muslims who don’t pray, Muslims who date. Why is this happening?Religion becomes like a fairytale, when they got old enough, they knew better than to believe in it. Most have little knowledge about Islam and have maybe memorized the right rituals to get by. Why beleive something on faith, they ask. After all we cannot see heaven or hell. How do we know Islam is right anyway?Islamic culture to them means marrying someone they never knew. It means arranged marriages and never hanging out or having fun. For girls Islamic culture has even less to offer. It would mean double standards or having to serve a husband the rest of her life.The western alternative to this looks a lot more attractive. In western culture “love and romance” are supposedly everywhere. Everyone is out looking for love freely. Meeting someone, going out, seeking pleasure sounds alot better. But whatabout the downside? For love at first sight, you need to have the right image, the right hair, the right clothes. Girls have to aspire to be likethe latest supermodels, they have to hold back age. Who’s going out with who, what are my friends thinking, what will happen if I don’t get the right girl or guy, what is my girlfriendor boyfriend thinking, all become important. Frustration, desperation, and unhappiness become the norm.Imagine all the heartache youth would save if they followed the Islamic alternative. In true Islam, unlike culture, there is no gameplaying. If two people wish to be involved they are both straight with one another. Unlike what goes on today amongst some Muslims, they both meet each other and make a contract to marry. Women are treated with respect, there is no sexual bombardment like there is in western society. Sex in western culture is also often seen as a vice or a sin of the flesh. But even in religious Islam, sex is seen as natural. As long as it is in the right circumstances, when the two are committed to one another in marriage.Drinking in college is also the norm unfortunately. If you don’t drink or party you’re seen as weird. Drinking is cool and a way for people to socialize, meet and have fun. The onewho doesn’t is less of a person and ‘misses out’. Drinking and all the harms that come with it is cut off at the root in Islam. So many problems are avoided, accidents, pregnancy, violence and even rape for example.In university and in the world, success in life is not seen in terms of religion. It is seen as what other people think, one’s careers, how much money they make. If you are religious you must have failed at life. But why do we have this seperation? and this blindness in religion?The Quran tells us again and again not to have blind faith, not to folllow the religion of our forefathers.Yet, we as Muslims have stopped thinking. We may think about what our friends or other people will say, but we avoid thinking about the real issues. We spend so much time on the opposite sex, thinking about careers, money etc, but we forget to think about death and how much of this we will really be able to take withus?“Every soul shall have a taste of death and only on the Day of Judgement shall you be paid your full recompense…for the life of this world is but goods and chattels of deception” (Quran 3:185)Shouldn’t we take the time to comtemplate what will happen to us after we hit the grave? After all, what is the point of life if we are not accountable for our actions? If there is no creator, what is the point of being honest or good.

Double Life of Muslim Students part 2

“After four years of living it up, I feel as if I’ve got it out of my system. I’ve always known that my years at university would be a fixed time in which I would be able to live my life the way I wanted to, but after doing what I thought I wanted, I realise that what my parents have planned for my future is not so bad.”Unfortunately, not all young Muslimsfind it so easy to forgo their new life.For Faribah Khan (23), a graduate of Bath University, her education, and all that has come with it, has been a major source of tension with her parents.“The only reason my parents allowedme to go to university was because they hadn’t found a suitable man for me, and an education was a respectable second best to marriage,” she says.“I was excited about university and getting away from home. It was my chance to escape.”Although her family moved from Iranto the UK when she was three, Faribah’s parents have made sure she would never forget her roots.“We speak Farsi and Iranian food is always on the table. Going home is like travelling from the UK to the Middle East.”“The religion goes hand in hand withthe culture. I was brought up to fast during Ramadan, celebrate festivals and have an innate belief in the principles of Islam.”In a bid to break free, Faribah appliedto universities such as Birmingham and Leeds, where she believed she would be able to live independently from her parents.“But they refused to let me live away from home and insisted I should go to the local university in Bath.”“I resented that – just as I resented the fact that I had no choice in what I studied. It had to be science as it was ‘respectable’.”Despite having to live in the family home, Faribah still managed to enjoysome of the student life on offer. And her parents’ worst nightmare came true when she fell in love with a British boy.“Robert and I dated for the whole time I was studying, but I knew there was no real future to our relationship. He wasn’t a Muslim so my parents would never have accepted him.”“I kept him a secret. I would lie and say I was staying at a friend’s house so I could spend the night with him inhis student digs.”“He hated the lying and the fact he could never meet my family. It made our relationship seem wrong, bad, dirty even.”For devout Muslims, this really is the crux of the matter. How can a womancall herself a Muslim and behave in away that contravenes the laws laid down by Islam?But having been brought up in Britain, most of these girls find no contradiction in taking a couple of years off from tradition to enjoy whatall their friends are doing.And ironically, these women are only experiencing what their brothers have been doing for years.“It’s almost an accepted rite of passage that men go to university and live it up before returning home to settle down with a good Muslim girl,” says Amina (30) from London.“One guy I know has had a succession of girlfriends throughout his time at university. He’s living withone of them now but admits he’d never marry any of them.”Faribah also knew her freedom and relationship had a shelf life. “I cried for a month when my university course ended,” she confesses. “I was convinced I’d be married off within a year to a suitable Iranian man.”That day still hasn’t arrived. Now, nearly three years after leaving university, she is still living with her parents, but is also working in publicrelations.‘They think I’m still a virgin but if theyever knew, they would either ostracise me or marry me off to the first potential suitor, like they did with my sister, Leila.”“She married young. She knows about my life and has the same wishes as me. But she has to keep herviews hidden from her husband. She’s content because he is a good man. But I don’t want to be content; I want to be happy.”Not surprisingly, many Muslim women students find it incredibly hard to lead this double life. In the case of Malaysian- born Faria (21), astudent at Sheffield University, her freedom came with overwhelming guilt.“In my country, unmarried men and women are not allowed to be alone together. If caught, you can be jailed or fined,” she says.“But because I was on my own, I felt I could enjoy a Western life. I dated and eventually slept with a boy I met here.”For a while, she enjoyed her new-found openness. But soon, she was overcome by feelings of guilt and paranoia.“I felt anxious throughout our relationship and had to lie to my parents and tell them I spent all my time studying.”“Then finally, last year, I had a nervous breakdown. I couldn’t cope with my double life any more. I regrethaving a sexual relationship. I can’t wait to finish my studies and go backto my country to make a fresh start.”“If anyone in Malaysia discovered the truth, my life wouldn’t be worth living.”But though they have had very differing experiences there is one thing Sofia, Faribah and Faria agree on: they all expect to have an arranged marriage and are insistent they will keep their wild-child days secret from their husbands.As Faribah says: “I know people will find it hard to understand that after living a free life I am willing to acceptan arranged marriage, but ultimately, my family is all I have.”

Double Life of Muslim Students part 1

By Claire ColemanFor the past four years, 24-year-old engineering student Sofia Ahmed has been leading a double life. During a typical week, she will study in her university library by day, then head to any one of Liverpool’s many student bars at night.There, she will party until the early hours: drinking, smoking and experimenting with the hedonistic lifestyle of a typical British undergraduate.But at the weekend, Sofia plays the role of a completely different person; a dutiful daughter of a well-to-do, traditional Muslim family who have raised their daughter to shun such Western temptations.“Every Friday I get on a train home to Manchester to stay with my family,” she says. “It isn’t up for discussion; itis just expected. Before I leave, I tidy myself up, make sure I don’t smell of drink or cigarettes, and head home toplay the dutiful daughter, helping my mother in the kitchen, attending mosque and sitting with my parents’ guests.”On Sunday night, Sofia returns to Liverpool and the cycle begins again.“Within half an hour, I will be slipping into a sexy dress and be on my way to a bar to meet friends.”For most teenagers, university life brings the first experience of freedomfrom parental control. It is a taste of a life to come.But for many female Muslims like Sofia, this taste is bittersweet. When she graduates this year, she will return to her parents’ home, where she’ll revert back to the life of a “goodgirl”, cocooned in a close-knit community where drinking, smoking and having boyfriends is considered sinful.“In my time at university I have done everything that is forbidden by my religion. I didn’t set out to rebel, nor did I feel peer pressure to do what I’ve been doing,” she says.“I was just genuinely curious about what all my friends were getting up to. You can’t grow up in this country and ignore the culture around you.”And as more Muslim women than ever go into higher education, this double life is becoming something ofa hidden social phenomenon.Psychologist Irma Hussain has counselled many Muslim women who have experienced this culture clash.“Muslim women have faced these conflicts for more than 20 years, but nowadays more women who come from very traditional families are going into higher education, which they never would have been allowed to before.”“It is a great temptation to break fromtradition when they are away from their family and everyone around them is having a good time, but it is not without consequences.”“Some may look back and think it was fun, but others struggle with the double life and can never be happy leading such a conflicting existence.”But those thoughts are far from their minds when they set out.“My first night at university was amazing,” recalls Sofia. “I’d never really gone out before, so I had no clothes to wear. That afternoon, I went out and bought a sparkly red top with a scoop neck and a cut-away back. I wore it that night with black trousers and heels so highthey made my feet hurt. I was really excited.”“In the student bar, there was a promotion on alcopops. Never having drunk before, I was knocking them back. I hadn’t gone out with the intention of getting drunk or of kissing a man, but I did both. That pretty much set the tone for the next four years.”Luckily for Sofia, her university years quenched her thirst for freedom, and she is now happy that those days are coming to an end.

Etiquettes for the Seeker of Sacred Knowledge

Etiquettes for the Seeker of Sacred Knowledge and the Snare of ShaytanShaykh Nazim Mangera, sunniforum.comFor a long time I have wanted to discuss some etiquettes about reading Islamic literature and listening to speeches delivered by scholars. We should read and listen with the intention of benefiting from their writings and their speeches. Whatever our intention is, that is what we will get from it. If we read and listen with the intention of increasing our knowledge and tryingto act upon it, Insha Allah that is what we will gain. If we read and listen with the intention of criticizing and taking out mistakes and finding faults, then we will find mistakes and faults and that is the only thing we will get from it. It’s very easy to criticize destructively and it is often said that it’s easier to haul down than to build.Scholars elaborate this by citing the following example: Two types of animals are set free in a garden; one is a bird and the other is a swine. Thebird will look for clean and pure sustenance, whereas the swine will look for filth and dirt. Whatever intention they have, they will get. So the bird enters the garden and finds clean and pure sustenance and the swine/pig enters the garden and searches for filth and garbage and dirt and finds it because no garden isfilth free. They both got what they wanted.Another point the scholars make is that we should read and listen with the desire and urge to increase our knowledge and act upon it and propagate it to others. If we have no desire to increase but rather we think we know everything, then we will hardly benefit from their writings and speeches and eventually we will only be harming ourselves.The following example is cited:If an empty glass is put under a tap, and the mouth of the glass is facing down, then it does not matter how fast the water is coming out, the glass will never get full for obvious reasons. But if that same glass is facing the correct way and the mouthof the glass is facing up, then it does not matter if the force of the water is low, but a time will come that the glass will be full of water.If we have the intention of benefiting, then we will benefit tremendously. And if we have the intention of finding faults and mistakes, then we will find them. For sure, there will be times when there will be grammatical mistakes in the writings. There will be mistakes of wrong word usage. But is that a good reason to get happy over the mistake? That is nothing but the Shaytan’s method of preventing you from benefiting from a scholar’s advice. Being happy over a person’s mistake is either a sign of pride or jealousy- two of the most devastating sins of the soul. If we get happy at a mistake of another, it is a sign of a spiritual sickness. There will be times when your writings will be better than a scholar’s writings; there will be times when you will speak better than the scholar. But that gives us no reason to be put off by the scholar’s advice.There could be many reasons why your writings or your method of speaking could be better than a scholar’s writing. One reason is usually in the Madrassah’s run by Asian scholars, very little attention is paid to the English language. The majority of our lectures were either inUrdu or Arabic. That trend is slowly changing though. Another reason could be that the scholar does not spend much time in English speakingcountries. Now when the scholar willspeak, there might be a stutter or an accent or the pace will be slow. But that should never be a reason to ignore the scholar’s advice. It is the content of the speech which really matters. Just because a person is an eloquent speaker does not mean that the content of the speech is correct aswell. Being eloquent is one thing, andbeing correct is a completely different matter.Another point I wish to clarify is that after reading an article or listening toa speech, some things might not be clear to us or go against our prior view on the matter. In this case, in a polite manner, ask the scholar that this is what I understood from your speech but I thought it was supposedto be like this. Am I correct in my understanding or not? I’m sure the scholar will not mind if we have any questions on the topic. Never hesitateto ask questions because two types of people never increase in their knowledge: A proud person and a shy person.Also, if we think that the scholar has made a mistake somewhere, then bring up the point with the scholar in a polite manner and discuss it. We all are prone to mistakes. Only Allah is free of all blemishes and faults.

Etiquettes of Students

If you are a student, then you should observe the praiseworthy rules of a student’s dealing with a learned man. These rules are:1.to greet the learned man first2.to speak little in his presence3.not to speak much so long as his teacher does not ask him anything4.not to ask him questions before receiving his permission5.not to say, by the way of objection to his words, “So-and-so said contrary to what you have said.”6.not to argue against his opinion in such a way as to show that he knows the truth than his teacher7.not to argue against his companions in his meetings8.not to look around but to sit with downcast eyes, quietly and courteously as if he were engaged in ritual prayer9.not to speak to him much when he is tired10.to stand up in order to show respect for him when he stands11.not to follow him speaking and questioning and asking him questions along the street until reaches home12.not to imagine evil of him in regard to those of his actions which appear abominable. The teacher knows better concerning his secret affairs13.When some actions of the teacher appear abominable, the student should recollect the complaint made by the prophet Moses to Al-Khidr (may peace be on them both):“Have you made a hole in the boat to drown the people in it? You have indeed, done a strange thing”(Qur�an 18:71)In fact Prophet Moses was wrong in his complaint, which he made relying upon the outward appearance (of what al- Khidr did).From The beginning of Guidance (bidayat al-hidaya) p. 77 from Imam Ghazali translated by Mashhad Al-Allaf

A Sermon from the Dying to the Living

There once lived in Basrah a prolific and profoundly spiritual worshipper whose fear of the Hereafter caused him to become physically weak, and whose constant crying made him skinny and sick. When he was on his deathbed, his family gathered around him, and they all began to cry.“Help me sit up.” He said. He addressed his father first: “O my father, what is making you cry?”“My son,” began his father, “I remembered that I will lose you, and that I will be alone after you die.”The worshipper then turned his gaze towards his mother and said, “O my Mother, what is making you cry?”“I am crying because I will soon haveto taste the bitterness of losing you,” she said.He then turned to his sister and asked, “what is making you cry?”“Because I will soon lose out on your kindness and will consequently have to depend on others for help,” she said.Finally, he looked at his children and asked, “what is making you cry?”“The prospect of hard and humiliating life of being orphans after you die,” they said. Now it was his trun to cry. “And what is making you cry?” everyone asked.“I am crying because I saw that each one of you cried for his or her own self, and not for me, he said. Is there none among you who cries for the long, hard journey I am about to embark upon, and the few supplies (i.e. good deeds) that I have for it? Is there none among you who cries because I will be lying down in dirt? Is there none among you who cries because I will be held accountable (and might have to endure punishment)? Is there none among you who cries because of when I will stand before the Lord of all that exists(for judgement)?” He then rolled over onto his face, when they tried to movehim, they realised that he had just died.Source: Al-Mawa’iz Wal Majalis

What to do upon a Death

By Dr. Abdulhayy ‘Arifi rahimahullahWHEN SIGNS OF DEATH START SHOWING UPThe blessed Companion Aboo Sa’eedKhudri radiyallahu anhu narrates that the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam said, “Prompt the dying among you to say (the kalimah): Lã ilãha illallãh (I declare that there is no god but Allah).” (Muslim) The blessed Companion Ma’qil Ibne Yasãr radiyallahu anhu narrates that the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam said, “You should recite Soorah Yãseen over the dying among you.” (Musnade-Ahmad, Aboo Dãwood, Ibne Mãjah)IN THE AGONY OF DEATHTurn the face of the dying person towards the Qiblah. Let him or her make the following prayer, “O Allah, forgive me and have mercy on me and have me join higher companions.” (Tirmizi)RULINGS1. Soon after the signs of death become obvious, make the dying person lie on his back with the Qiblah on his right. Turn the face slightly towards the Qiblah, raise the head a little by placing a pillow or some other head-rest, in which case also, the dying person will be considered as facing the Qiblah. But leave the dying person as he is if he feels uncomfortable while being made to face the Qiblah. One should sit down close by and say loudly, “Ash’hadu allã ilãha illallãhu wahdahoo lã shareeka lahoo wa ash’hadu anna Muhammadan ‘abduhoo wa rasooluh.” (I bear witness that there is no god but Allah. He is One, there is no partner with Him; and I bear witness that Muhammad sallalahu alayhi wasallam is His Servant and His Messenger.) Given his condition, do not ask him to recite the kalimah, for that is a time of great trial – who knows what he might say under stress.2. After the dying person has recited the kalimah once, leave it at that. Do not try to make him say the kalimah non-stop in an effort to see that he breathes his last whilst reciting it. For, the purpose is simply to make sure that the last words he says should be the kalimah. It is not at all necessary that the recitation of the kalimah continues right through the last breath. However, should he return to the mundane and the ordinary concerns of life, start reciting the kalimah again. When he, taking the cue, recites it, then be silent.3. When breath loses its momentum and starts heaving faster and legs sag down, unable to stay up and the nose-top turns aside and the templescollapse inwards, take these signs to be the certain knock of death. At this time, start reciting the kalimah in a raised voice. 4. Reciting Soorah Yãseen lightens the hardship of death. Recite it sittingon the side of his head or anywhere else near the body, or ask someone else to do it.5. At a time such as this, say nothing which may divert his attention to the concerns of worldly life, for this is thetime to leave the mortal world and bepresent in the majestic Court of Allah Almighty. Do say that which turns hisheart away from the concerns of the mortal world and diverts it towards the thoughts of his Creator, for it is here that the well being of the dying lies. At a time like this, bringing his children and family members before him, or anyone else he loved most, or to remind him of things or people in a nostalgic manner causing him to be swamped in the thoughts of loves lost, is a terrible thing to do to him. It is not nice that he says farewell to hislife in the world so bound by its fond memories.6. If, at the time of death, some unfortunate remark bordering on kufr (the denial of Faith) escapes the lips of the dying person, feel or say nothing about it. Instead, take it to be a slip of his reason under the stress of approaching death. When man loses his reason, he stands forgiven for his sayings and deeds. Keep praying that Allah Almighty forgives him.7. When death comes, all concerned should say, “Innã lillãhi wa innã ilayhi rãji’oon” (Surely to Allah we belong, and to Him we are to return) and make the following prayer, “O Allah, help me in my hour of trial and replace it for me with what is better.” (Tirmizi)8. When death becomes obvious and certain, take a strip of cloth, wideenough to pass under the chin, bring it on to the head, tie a knot, then close the eyes gently and pray, “I begin with the Name of Allah while being faithful to the Religion of His Messenger sallalahu alayhi wasallam. O Allah, make his matter easy on him and that which he is to face after death, and make him the blessed beholder of Thy Sighting, and make that to which he has departed better than what he has departed from.” (Durre-Mukhtãr)9. Then straighten hands and feet, bring toes of the feet close together and tie them with a strip of cloth. Then, throw a sheet over the dead body and place it on a cot or a flat wooden bunk. Do not leave it lying on the ground. It is advisable to place some weight on the stomach lest it inflates. Allow no impure persons (in need of a bath, including women in conditions that exempt them from offering Salãh etc.) near the dead body. (Durre-Mukhtãr)Now inform relatives and friends of the deceased so that they can all participate in his funeral prayers.10. Some incense (such as oblibanum, lobãn or Frankincense), if available, may be placed near the deceased.11. Reciting the Qur’ãn near the deceased before the washing of the body is not correct. 12. All funeral arrangements including the shrouding of the dead body have to be made very quickly. Start with locating a gravesite and the preparation of the grave. Collect everything needed for the stages of washing, shrouding, funeral and burial.13. If a person dies on a Friday, it is better to make all arrangements and bury the deceased before the Jumu’ah congregational Salãh. Holding on to the prepared body withthe thought that there will be a lot of participants in the Janãzah salãh after Jumu’ah is makrooh (detested). (Shãmi) LET THERE BE NO WAILING OVER THE DECEASEDIt has been related in a Hadeeth that once the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam paid a visit to a Sahãbi who was on his deathbed. Seeing him in that condition, the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam broke in tears. When people saw him in that state, they too started weeping. He then said to them, “Listen to me O people, and listen well. Allah Almighty certainly does not apprehend the weeping eye and the hurting heart, for a Servant of Allah has no control over these.” Then, pointing to the tongue, he added, “Buta mistake made by this, that is, on intentional mourning and wailing, He punishes, and on reciting ‘Innã lillãhi wa innã ilayhi rãji’oon’ (To Allah we belong and to Him we are toreturn), and on raising hands of prayer and on seeking of His Forgiveness, He bestows His Mercy.” (Bukhãri, Muslim)KISSING THE DECEASEDAfter the deceased has been given therequired ghusl (bath), it is permissible to kiss the deceased under intense desire to express love or personal devotion as it was with the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam when he kissed ‘Uthmãn Ibne Maz’oon radiyallahu anhu and wept. Very similar to this, the noble Companion Aboo Bakr radiyallahu anhu kissed the forehead of the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam after his departure from this mortal world. (Zãdul-Ma’ãd)ALL FUNERAL ARRANGEMENTS SHOULD BE SWIFT It has been narrated that once the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam came to visit Talhah Ibne Barã radiyallahu anhu when he was sick. Seeing his critical condition, he said to the people around him, “I feel that the time of his death has arrived. If it does come to pass, I should be informed and funeral arrangements be made with haste, for it is not appropriate that the dead body of a Muslim be left amidst his family members for long.” (Aboo Dãwood)‘Abdullah Ibne ‘Umar radiyallahu anhuma narrates that he heard the Prophet sallalahu alayhi wasallam saying, “When one among you dies, do not keep him in the house for long. Make haste in taking him to the grave and burying him.” (Bayhaqi, Shu’abul-Imãn)Source: idauk.org

A Good Sealing State: Husn al-Khatima part 2

Here is a supplication that is commonly known: “O Turner of the hearts, establish my heart on your Din, keep it firm on your Deen. You are the turner of hearts.”We should ask Allah to keep our hearts sound and firm on the Deen because we do not know how and when things could change, and we could become guilty of being boastful about our achievements and this could be the cause of our downfall. This is why having humility, being humble, is always important.The great scholars have highlighted a few major causes of a bad sealing state. One of the main causes is intoxicants. This could be of any form, including drinking, smoking or the taking of drugs, because intoxicants can overcome a person’s rationality and can affect one’s ability to focus or to be conscious of one’s actions.‘Abd al-‘Aziz ibn Rawwad says, “I was present when somebody was in the last moments of their life. They were being encouraged to say Laa ilaha illalaah, but the person refused to say it. The final statement the person then uttered was: “He is a disbeliever in what you are saying!”So ‘Abd al-‘Aziz ibn Rawwad enquired about him, and was informed that, although he did not doit in public, this man was given to drinking in small amounts. This is what overcame him in his last moments. It was then that ‘Abd al-‘Aziz ibn Rawwad advised that one must beware of committing any sin as that is what had caused this person to have this ending.The scholars mention that a sign of agood sealing state is perspiration at the time of death, and another sign is contentment or satisfaction at the time of death, evidenced by a smile on the face of the person despite the way in which he or she has died. An example of this comes from the stories of martyrs, who may have been killed in a gruesome way, but on whose faces can be seen peace and a sense of happiness.There are numerous occasions where Allah opens up these kinds of states for his pious servants, blessing them with a vision, and making their state apparent to people around them so as to inspire and encourage others to do good because they have seen the person’s life, and now they see their state at death.It is related about ‘Abdullah ibn al-Mubarak (Allah be pleased with him) that when death was approaching him, the people around him were saying Laa Ilaaha Illallah. ‘Abdullah ibn al-Mubarak looked up towards the heavens and said, “For the like of this do the people work all their life.” He was given an unveiling of what Allah had kept for him in the Hereafter.The story of ‘Umar ibn ‘Abd al-‘Aziz (Allah be pleased with him) who was a caliph for about two years and six months, was able to change the whole order and system of the time for the better. At the time of his death, people were gathered around him, and he said to them, “Leave me, nobody should remain here.” Thereafter, the people moved away and sat outside his doors. ‘Umar ibn ‘Abd al-‘Aziz (Allah be pleased with him) was heard saying, “Welcome to these faces. These are not the faces ofthe human or jinn.” He then recited an ayah of the Qur’an: “That is the abode of the Hereafter which we designate for those who do not want to cause tyranny or corruption in thisworld. Well-being is only for those who have the fear of Allah.” Then ‘Umar ibn ‘Abd al-‘Aziz (Allah be pleased with him) breathed his last.Allah (May He be glorified and exalted) does not deprive or humiliate his pious servants who have worked hard all their lives to please Allah, neither in this life, nor inthe Hereafter. When Allah loves a person, He will place for them acceptance in the world. People will begin to love them.Anas (Allah be pleased with him) reports that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) said, “When Allah intends good for someone, He uses him (or takes him for his service).” The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) was then asked, “How will Allah use him?” The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) replied; “Beforedeath, Allah will give him the tawfeeq(divine Guidance) to do something good.”In another hadith, the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) said, “When Allah wants something good for someone, He willuse him.” The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) was asked, “How will Allah use him?” The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him and grant him peace) replied, “Allah will inspire himto do a good action, which he will do before his death, so much so that his neighbours and those people aroundhim will become happy with him.”Regardless of what a person does or who they are in front of, Allah will select a person and desire good for him and give him the ability to do good actions for his Deen before he dies. That action will then be a means of accomplishment and acceptance for the individual in the sight of Allah, and thus he or she will leave this world with a good sealing state.We must ask Allah (May He be glorified and exalted) to use us for some form of good work for the Deen,regardless of our area of work or profession. One may think that “I am not capable of giving lectures or calling people towards Allah,” or other commonly known deeds that we see others doing. Do not fear. Regardless of your capabilities, ask Allah to open the doors of guidance. Whatever you do, Allah will guide you to some way in which you are able to do some good work that will be the cause of Allah’s being pleased with you and the people being pleased with you as well. If you already have tawfeeq to do good actions, whether this is through da’wah, or benefitting society through some community work, then ask Allah (May He be glorified and exalted) to accept it, make it a truly genuine and sincere, and ask that you be accepted for the service of His Deen.Allah (May He be glorified and exalted) gives tawfeeq to his pious servants who have strived and worked hard all their lives to please Him and have done service for His Deen, enabling them to do good actions at the time of death. Ultimately what matters is what is going to happen then and how death will arrive. It is important to remember that it is not only the scholars or learned people who are able to achieve this good sealing state. It is not only through preaching or giving lectures that one can be of service to the Deen. There are numerous ways in which we can benefit humanity, things that we can do to assist and make it easier for people to worship Allah. The options are limitless.May Allah accept us and use us in theservice of His Deen.May Allah make our actions until the end like the actions of the people of Paradise.May Allah protect us, and forgive us, and may He remove the hidden defects inside us and the hidden and apparent sins.May Allah give us tawfeeq to recognise virtue and to follow it.May Allah give us tawfeeq to recognise evil and to abstain from it.May Allah give us a good sealing state.And Allah is glorified and exalted.Amin.Transcribed by Yunus bin YusufEdited by Adnan AshrafSource:www.zamzamacademy.com

A Good Sealing State: Husn al-Khatima part 1

By Mufti Abdur Rahman ibn YusufThe final state of a person at the time of death is what matters in the Hereafter. In this article, we discuss some of the causes for both good and evil sealing states, and how a person’s inner traits will dominate atthe time of death.In a hadith transmitted by Ibn Abi’al-Dunya in his Commanding the Good and Forbidding Evil from Abu Umama (Allah be pleased with him) the Prophet (Allah bless him and givehim peace) said to his Companions (Allah be pleased with them): “How will your situation be when your women become tyrannical, your youth become transgressors and youabandon striving and jihad in the path of Allah?” They asked, “Will that really occur? The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Yes, by the One in whose hand my soul is, something even worse than that will occur.” They said, “What could be worse than that, O Messenger of Allah?”The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said; “How will your state be when you stop commanding the good and you stop preventing theevil?” They said, “Is that something that will occur?”The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “How will it be when you will begin to consider the good as evil, and when you will begin to consider the evil as good?” [They were shocked] and said, “Is that truly to occur, O Messenger of Allah?”The Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said, “Yes, of course. Allah says that I swear by Myself that I will spread such a trial in the land that even the wise ones among you could become lost.”This hadith tells us of a gradual change in perspectives among people as their righteous behaviour diminishes and they eventually confuse what is good for what is evil, leading to a state where even those known for their wisdom have become lost. At present, we are living through, and witnessing, many of thethings which the hadith describes. The point to ponder is that, if Allah has not saved us from these evils, then we may already be guilty of considering what is good according to the Shari‘a to be evil, and what is evil according to the Shari‘a to be good.There is another hadith in which the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said: “A servant does work like that of the people of Paradise until there is a short distance left between him and Paradise, when the destiny written about him by Allah (May He be glorified and exalted) [through his eternal knowledge] overcomes him, and he perpetrates an act of the people of Hellfire, and thus enters the Hellfire. Then, there are certain servants who do the actions of the people of Hellfire all their life, until there is a very short distance remaining between them and the Hellfire, until the destiny written about them by Allah (May He be glorified and exalted) overcomes them and they do an act of the peopleof Paradise and thus they enter into Paradise.”An explanation of this hadith is that some people’s actions are considered evil based on how they are perceived by other people and other people’s actions are considered good based on how he orshe is viewed by others. However, there is something hidden inside the individual that eventually overcomeshim or her, which is why the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace) said that what is really taken into consideration is the final sealing state of an individual at the time of their death (innama ’l-a’mal bi’l-khawatim).The above hadith indicates that whatreally matters is husn al-khatima or su’ al-khatima.Husn al-khatima means a good sealing state, and su’ al-khatima means a bad sealing state.These terms do not refer to what a person has been doing all life long, or how they appeared to be in the sight of others, but rather to the state that they are in at the time they leave this world, their sealing state. This is why the scholars mention that the evil sealing state is such that, even though a person’s actions may appear to be very virtuous, this evil sealing state occurs due to an inner trait which was concurrent with the good that a person did in front of others. Whilst it was perceived that these actions were good, there remained something inside the individual which concurrently occurred or was a regular habit but which was not expressed in front of others. This inner trait was evil and eventually took over, leading one to commit an act of the people of the Hellfire. Likewise, many people who seem to be disobeying the Shari‘a forlong periods in their lives have within their hearts much goodness which has not yet dominated and is just waiting to surface and appear in their external actions. Due to the existence of these good qualities, which are pleasing to Allah (May He be glorified and exalted), a person’s goodness can become dominant before he or she passes away.The Companions (Allah be pleased with them) knew the system of Allah and therefore always remained concerned, primarily about how they would be viewed by Allah regarding their actions. One of the greatest believers and close Companions of the Prophet (Allah bless him and givehim peace) was ‘Umar ibn al-Khattab (Allah be pleased with him), who is considered the second greatest man after Abu Bakr. ‘Umar ibn al-Khattab (Allah be pleased withhim) would often say, “Have I been regarded (by Allah) as a hypocrite? Will I die with an evil sealing state?” He would ask Huzayfa (Allah be pleased with him) if his name was included in the list of the hypocrites that was given to Huzaifa (Allah be pleased with him) by the Prophet (Allah bless him and give him peace).He was constantly worried despite having to his credit so many acts of worship and so many conquests. ‘Umar (Allah be pleased with him) knew that the inner dimensions of a person are what matter and not the external, apparent actions; and that one should be content with the former.

At the face of death

A heart-touching story… learn from it.This is something that is very personal and important to me. I hopethat you will learn and benefit from it. Let me begin by saying “Bismillah.” When I first started University, I had met another Muslim brother. We had become good friends, but this friendship was not like any other ordinary friendship, I would have done anything for him, he was like my real brother.During our last year of University, this brother of mine announced that he was engaged and that he was to be married after he graduates this year and finds himself a job. I was glad for him and so was he. He talked non stop about getting married, I was sort of getting jealous of him, because the brother had it made for him, finishing school, getting married and especially coming from a wealthy family.One day this brother was to meet me at the coffee shop. He showed up, but astonishingly he wasn’t smiling and wasn’t talking about his fiancée. I asked him what was wrong, he askedif we could talk somewhere privately and we did. Finally I knew why he was upset. He had told me that he found out that he had a brain tumor which was malignant, which meant it had become cancerous. When he told me the news, his voice was quivering and tears were streaming down his cheeks.I had never seen him like this before. Itried keeping in my tears and I tried not to show that I was hurt also. I was burning up inside and things were racing through my mind. I kept thinking, how could this have happened? A man who had everything made and had everything perfect. I kept it inside because I did not want him to see me upset.I saw this brother slowly go down. He had to drop out of school at his last year because he began to lose his memory and he started to repeat himself over again. He did not have achance at school without his memory. This brother was intelligent, but after, he became lost.He was told that his fianceés family and her parents did not want their daughter to marry him, because he had no job and basically no future. This was hard for him, I remember hewould cry to me about her and how he cared for her and how hopeless hefelt.Later, the brother had problems writing and his right eyesight was fading. The tumor was on the left side of his brain so it affected everything on his right. Because of his memory loss, the brother soon forgot suras and he even forgot how to pray. A year later, his right arm was paralyzed and his eyesight was taken away from him. It was the hardest thing for me to see. The brother I loved so much as going through so much. I began coming over everyday helping him recite suras.When I was recited sura Fatiha to him and he was slowly repeating after me, I looked at him and I thought, this was the same brother who was so intelligent and was to finish school. This was the same brother who came from such a wealthy family. This was the same brother who talked for days about getting married and raising a family.This was the same brother who had everything. But now he can barely remember what I said to him ten minutes ago, he can’t get married, and now he is struggling to read Qur’an, he was not much of a practicing Muslim so it was harder for him to recite the Qur’an. This manwas now turning towards Allah, he dropped EVERYTHING and turned towards Allah. Allah gave him everything, and he could take everything away just as easily.A month ago, I had received a call saying that the brother passed away and that his janaza is today. I washed his body with a couple of other brothers and I saw his lifeless body. He was buried and after that I returned home. The next day, I sat down wondering to myself about the power of Allah. My brother’s death made me realize that we forget what our purpose of being here is for: To serve Allah. You could have everything, but do you have anything that is important? I spent six years knowing this brother, and caring for him. I never once shed a tear when hewas alive and not even when he passed away. But the day after his death, I did cry because I thought about the power of Allah. I thought about my brother. We always say that we will return to Allah, but we never really believe it. If we did, then we would struggle to read the Qur’anand pray to Allah like my brother did.My brother had his eyesight taken away from him, his arm was paralyzed and his memory was lost, but he still got up every morning and he insisted and I repeat, insisted on reciting the Qur’an. But we are able, but we still do not struggle to read the Qur’an. We do not really believe that we will return to Allah, or else wewould struggle for Allah.My brother had love for materialistic objects, but when death approached him, those things were no use to him because he knew those things were not going to lead him to Jannah without his Iman. Allah can give and take things easily whenever and wherever. I love my brother and I pray that Allah will accept him, and I humbly request that prayer be made for him. I do pray that you have a truebelief of Allah and our return to Him because if you do have this fear, you will struggle for your Islam to the best of your ability before you can say it is too late. May we all be rightlyguided. Ameen.

The Final Return

A police officer in a Muslim country wrote the following letter to a Shaykhdescribing the events that led to his return to Allah. He recalls: Seeing accidents and crash victims was a normal part of my day, but one incident was different.My partner and I had parked on the shoulder of the highway and began to chat. In a random second, the scene shattered to the hideous soundof metal bodies becoming one. We threw our heads back to see what had happened: a head-on collision, the result of a vehicle slipping into the lane of the oncoming traffic.You couldn’t describe the carnage. Two young men sprawled in the first car, both in critical condition. We carried them gently away from the car and rested them on the ground.Quickly we returned to assist the owner of the second car. He was dead. Back we went to the two young men lying side by side on the pavement.My partner began dictating the Shahadah to them. “Say: La iIaha illAllah (there is no god but Allah), La iIaha illAllah…”… their tongues wouldn’t acknowledge. They started hummingthe hypnotic lyrics of some song. I was terrified. My partner had experience however and he kept repeating his instruction.I stood watching, no movement, eyes locked. Never in my life had I seen anything similar to what was going on before me. In fact, I’ve never actually seen someone die, and neverin such a satanic way.My partner continued to instruct them to say the Shahadah but there was no use. The hum of their song came to a slow silence, slowly. The first one stopped and then the other. Not a stir. Dead.We carried them to our patrol car, mypartner made no effort to speak. Not a whisper between us two as we carried the corpses to the nearest hospital…The police officer fell back into routine, as he narrates, and started todrift from Allah. But another event happened to him that sealed the return. He continues: … What an odd world. After some time, about six months, a strange accident took place. A young man was moving along the highway normally, but within one of the tunnels leading to the city, he was maimed by a flat tire.To the side of the tunnel he parked and stepped to the back to remove the spare tire. The whistle of a speeding car from behind. In a second, it collided with the crippled car, the young man in-between. He fell to the ground with critical injuries. I rushed to the scene, myself and another partner other than the first. Together we carried the young man’s body into our patrol car and phoned the hospital to prepare for his arrival.He was a young adult in his blossom years. Religious, you could tell from his appearance. He was mumbling when we carried him, but in our rush,we had not paid attention to what he was saying. However, when we placed him on his back in the patrol car we could make it out. Through the pain his heart was reciting Qur’an! He was so immersed in the recitation … Subhan Allah, you wouldhave never said that this person was in intense pain.Blood had soaked his clothes crimson red, his bones had clearly snapped in several places. To tell the truth, he looked like he was staring into the eyes of death. He continued to read in his unique, tender voice. Reciting each verse in proper rhythm.In my entire life, I had never heard any recitation like it. I said to myself, I’m … I’m going to instruct him to say the Shahadah just like I saw my friend doing; especially since I had previous experience. My partner and I listened intently to that soft voice. I felt a shiver shock my back and up my arm, the hair stood.Suddenly, the hymn ceased. I watched silently as his hand rose softly. He had his index finger pointed upward to the heavens, saying the Shahadah (La ilaha illa Allah/There is no god but Allah). Then … his head slumpt. Nothing. I jumped to the back seat, felt his hand,his heart, his breathing. He was dead!I couldn’t stop staring at him. A tear fell but I hid it in shame. I turned backto my partner and told him that the boy’s life had ceased – he burst out loud crying. Seeing a man cry like that, I could not control myself and my partner faded away behind the fall of my own tears. The patrol car fogged from the emotions.We arrived at the hospital. As we rushed through the corridors, we toldall the doctors, nurses, and onlookers what had happened. So many people were affected by what we said, some stood there speechlessand tearful. No one wanted to lose sight of the boy until they had been assured of the time and place he would be buried. One of the hospital staff phoned the boys home. His brother picked it up and was told of the accident.His brother told us about him: He used to go out every Monday to visit his only grandmother outside of town. Whenever he visited her, he made sure to spend time with the poor children idling the streets and the orphans.The town knew him – he was the one that would bring them the Islamic books and tapes. His dusty Mazda would be filled with rice and sugar and even candies – couldn’t forget the candies – for those families who were in need.He would not stand for anyone to discourage him from the long journey to that town. He would always politely reply that the long drive gave him time to review his Quran and listen to Islamic lectures on his cassette deck. And … and that with every step to the town he hoped for the reward he would find with Allah…It is true, brothers and sisters, that Allah is Merciful and forgives and forgives. [Yet I am quite Forgiving … ] But to whom? [ … towards anyone who turns (in repentance) and believes and acts honorable; then he will be guided.] – Surah Taha 20/82[O our people! Respond to Allah’s Caller (Muhammad – sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam) and believe in him,Allah will forgive you of your sins and will save your from a painful torment.]- Surah al-Ahqaf 46/31Just like we reply someone’s call when they phone us – this is Allah and His Messenger calling us! Let us answer. There is a verse in the Qur’an that when Shaytaan read it hecried and felt regret. Read this verse, it is the door to our happiness in this life and the next:[And those who, if they commit an immorality or wrong themselves, remember Allah and seek forgiveness for their sins – and who can forgive sins except Allah? – and who do not persist in what they have done while they know.]Allah then continues: [For those – their reward is forgiveness from theirLord and gardens beneath which rivers flow (in Jannah), wherein they shall abide eternally. Excellent is the reward of the (righteous) workers.] – Surah Al-Imraan 3/135,136Allah sent the Prophets and the books; He sent the warners and glad tiders; and He sent the reminders. And atop all that, Allah comes down to Samaa’ ad-Dunya – in a way befitting of His Majesty – in the third portion of the night – every night – calling to every one of His servants: “Is there anyone who shall make Dua’ so that I shall accept His Du’a? Is there anyone who shall ask for pardon so that I may pardon him?”Dear brothers and sisters, let us make a pledge tonight to set our alarm clocks at 2 am in the morning. We all know that if there was some special sports event or someone had to catch a plane at that time they would be capable of waking up. Let’sset the alarm to pray only 2 raka’at toAllah. And in Sajdah, recall just one sin – just one – between us and Allahand ask Allah Ta’ala to forgive us for that sin, pledging that we shall never return to it.Source:Everymuslim

The Inevitable

By Aalimah Zafirah MohammedGraduate of Darul Uloom Trinidad and TobagoAll praises are for Allah who has given us life, the air to sustain us and has made us from amongst the best of mankind.Preparation! So much preparation. Everyday we prepare, either for a ceremony or a special occasion or just for our routine household activities in general. But we forget that there is an inevitable day that is coming. A day which we should be preparing for. A day we neglect to prepare for. When is that day and what time is that day is not known. It is different for each and every person,but it will definitely happen. It is a day in which a person will experience agony and pain more severe than all the agonies ever experienced in this world.It is narrated in a Hadeeth by Shaddad ibne Aus (RA) that the agony of death is more severe than all the agonies of this world and the hereafter. It is more painful than being sawed in two, being cut into pieces with shears or being boiled in a cauldron. If the dead were to rise from the graves and tell people aboutthe pangs of death, no man would take pleasure in this life, nor could anyone enjoy should sleep.So much for the pangs and throes of death, besides this, a dying man must also go though the ordeal of facing the angel of death. So horribleis the appearance of Izraeel (AS) when he comes to take the souls of the sinners and the non believers, that the strongest of men cannot bearthe sight. Even our dear Prophet Muhammad (SAW) used to seek refuge from the pangs of death saying:“Oh Allah grant us relief in the throes of death.”Then who are you and I, my respected Muslims?Shouldn’t we too seek Allah’s mercy and help from the inevitable and most certain day?Yes, my readers, it is the agony of death. What preparation have we made for this? Have we forgotten all about it? Allah Al Hakeem, Al Aleem says in the Holy Quraan:“Every soul shall taste death” (3:185).”So how can we have any doubts about it? It can overtake us at any moment. Why is it that some of us think that we can hide from death, or climb to the highest tower to escape its approach? Allah, Al Aliyu, (the Most High) says in the glorious Quraan:“Wherever you are, death will find you, even if you are in towers built up high (4:78)Luqman, the Wise, once advised his son saying;“Death is an occurrence of which the exact time is not known to anyone. Beprepared then, to meet death at any time, lest it should take you unaware or unprepared.”This advice of Luqman (AS) lives on today.Respected Muslims let us take heed to this advice. Let us not find ourselves in the arms of death in an unprepared state. Let us strive each and every day to prepare ourselves for that inevitable day, the day that is sure to come, our last day on this earth.

The Realm after Death (Barzakh)

It is the belief (‘Aqeedah) of deen that after death, mankind will enter a realm before the day of resurrection, which is known as Aalam-e-Barzakh. There are many sects in Islam who claim to be Muslims but do not believe in Aalam-e-Barzakh.’ This is a grave misunderstanding on behalf of these people. Death is the ultimate reality that no human can escape. It awes people and challenges all of their false claims of deviant beliefs. It puts an end to their hopes for prosperity and success in this life. Once there, they have no wayof returning to this life.Allah say’s in the noble Qur’aan:“Until, when death comes to one of them (those who join partners with Allah), he say’s, “My lord! Send me back. Perhaps I may do good in that which I have left behind,” Indeed no! It is but a word that he speaks, and behind them is a Barzakh until the day when they are raised up.”The discussion regarding Al-Barzakh is only based on authentic text from Allah’s book and his messengers Sunnah. It has been mentioned in the Qur’aan and has been established by numerous Ahaadeeth.Al-Barzakh has two states. A person will either be punished in this realm, which is known, as “Azhaabul-Qabr”or he will receive the blessings and bounties of Allah due to his faith and good deeds, this is known as “Tan’eemu Ahlit-Taa’ah Fil Qabr.”Majority of the books on six Aqeedah only mention the former state and suffice on that. This is due to the fact that the narration regarding six Azhaabul-Qabr exceeds the narrations regarding Tan’eemu Ahlit-Taa’ah Fil Qabr. Also, due to the fact that there are more people who will be punished in the grave than those who shall receive bounties. It is reported in an very lengthy Hadeeth reported by Ahmed and Abu Dawood on the authority of Al-Baraa Bin Azhib, that they (the companions) when out with Allah’s messenger to the funeral of a man from the Ansaar.They reached the location of the grave before it was dug. The messenger of Allah sat down facing the Qibla; and they sat around him quietly, as if afraid to disturb birds standing on their heads. He held in his hand, a stick with which he was moving the earth, raising and lowering his eyes three times. He said to them (two or three times), “seek refuge in Allah from the punishment of the grave.” Then he said (three times), “oh! Allah I seek refuge in you from the punishment of the grave.”From this Hadeeth, we can see that the prophet himself seeked refuge from the punishment of the grave. Nohuman being will be speared from the squeeze of the grave. However, the following Hadeeth indicates that it is not the same degree of severity for all people; some it would be Sa’ad bin Mu’az; however, he was squeezed once then released.” (Narrated by At-Tabrani in Al-Kabir).However those who will receive the bounties and the mercy of Allah will truly be in the gardens of bliss. Although it is apparent that the best protection against punishment in thegrave is to carry the truth belief in Allah and avoid the major sins. There are specific things that are mentioned in the Ahaadeeth that protect a person from the punishment of the grave. These things are as follows: Martyrdom on the battlefield (At-Tirmizhi), standingguard in the way of Allah (Muslim), death caused by abdomen disease (At-Tirmizhi), reciting suratul Mulk (Al-Hakim), Dying on Friday (Ahmed and At-Tirmizhi).Before the two above mentioned, it states that the person will be approached by Munkar and Nakeer.Author:(Maulana) Afikul Islam(Arabic Year 6 – 2001), Darul Uloom London

5 Things to Reflect Upon

O! You Muslims who are…1.Desirous to drive large, shiny cars,REMEMBER: You will be driven one day as a horizontal passenger.2.Wild and crazy over expensive clothes,REMEMBER: You will end up in just a ‘KAFN.’3.Recklessly sacrificing everything to construct beautiful homes and palatial mansions,REMEMBER: the graveyard ‘PIT’ – one’s real home.4.Greedily devouring tasty dishes and all types of extravagant delicacies,REMEMBER: one day YOU will be the meal for ants, worms and other insects.5.Aspiring for fame, fortune, and bright lights.REMEMBER: the awaiting darkness and loneliness in the grave.Source: ‘DEATH’ by Husainiyah Publications Estcourt

7 Wonders in Man

1.Man is aware about his inevitable death, yet he indulges in laughter and merriment.2.Knowing that this world will come to an end, man still hankers after it.3.Man knows that everything has been predestined yet he laments over the loss of something.4.Man has been warned and hasthe full knowledge about the fire of hell but he continues to sin.5.Man believes in the Reckoning of the hereafter but still he persists in amassing wealth.6.Declaring his belief in the Unity and Oneness of Allah, yetman remembers others besides Allah.7.Man believes in Jannah but still finds pleasure in the idle pursuit of this fleeting world.Source: ‘DEATH’ by Husainiyah Publications Estcourt

Flight Janazah

AsSalaam WaAlaykum WaRehmatullah WaBarkaatuhuWelcome aboard Fly Air JanazahWhen we are leaving this world for the next one, it shall be like a trip to another country.Where details of that country won’t be found in glamorous travel brochures but in the Holy Qura’an and the Hadiths.Where our plane won’t be Indian Air Lines, British Airways, Gulf Air or Emirates but Air Janazah.Where our luggage won’t be the allowed 30 Kgs but our deeds no matter how heavy they weigh.You don’t pay for excess luggage. They are carried free of charge, with your Creator’s compliment.Where our dress won’t be a Pierre Cardin suit or the like but the white cotton shroud.Where our perfume won’t be Channel, Paco Rabane, but the camphor and attar.Where our passports won’t be Indian, British, French or American but Al Islam.Where our visa won’t be the 6 months leave to stay or else but the “La Illaha Illallah”. Where the airhostess won’t be a gorgeous female but Isra’iil and its like. Where the in-flight services won’t be 1st class or economy but a piece of beautifully scented or foul smelling cloth. Where our place of destination won’t be Heathrow Terminal 1 or Jeddah International Terminal but the last Terminal Graveyard. Where our waiting lounge won’t be nice carpeted and air-conditioned rooms but the 6 feet deep gloomy Qabar.Where the Immigration Officer won’t be His Majesty’s officers but Munkar and Nakeer. They only check out whether you deserve the place you yearn to go. Where there is no need for Customs Officers or detectors. Where the transit airport will be Al Barzakh. Where our final place of destination will be either the Garden under which rivers flow or the Hellfire.This trip does not come with a price tag. It is free of charge, So your savings would not come handy. This flight can never be hijacked so do notworry about terrorists. Food won’t beserved on this flight so do not worry about your allergies or whether the food is Halal. Do not worry about legroom; you won’t need it, as our legs will become things of the past. Do not worry about delays. This flight is always punctual. It arrives and leaves on time. Do not worry about the in-flight entertainment program because you would have lost all your sense of joy. Do not worry about booking this trip, it has already been booked (return) the day you became a foetus in your mother’s womb.Ah! At last good news! Do not worry about who will be sitting next to you. You will have the luxury of being the only passenger. So enjoy it while youcan. If only you can! One small snag though, this trip comes with no warning. Are you prepared…..you better be ! Please spread the truth and Insha-Allah our Muslim brothers & sisters will understand and practice the guiding principles, whatever way they can afford to uphold our believe of our religion Islam in this world and in the hereafter.

Be a Good Host/ Visitor

When visiting the homes of family members, relatives, friends or others we must never be a burden upon them.Visiting unannounced, at awkward times, sitting too long, asking too many questions, speaking too loudly,allowing our children to run a mock if they are with us etc is all unethical.We should also be considerate of those we visit by not allowing them to prepare snacks or meals for us when they are busy, sickly or in a rush to go somewhere.On the other hand when people visit us although we should honour them, we do not have to prepare sophisticated meals & fries etc all the time. A simple snack or glass of water would also suffice.Whether more or less, whatever is served must be from the depth of our hearts.Mufti Ismail Menk

Using Mobile Phones

Etiquettes of the Mobile PhoneIslam has never been opposed to advancement. However, certain advancements are such that togetherwith their benefits come much harm. Whilst mobile technology and the mobile phone in particular has revolutionised the way we live, it is important that we utilise such technology appropriately.Crude MannersIt is important to realise that there are certain etiquettes of speaking on the phone. For example when calling someone, many people do not first ask the person they are calling whether it is convenient for them to speak at that very moment. They simply begin a long conversation without any regard for the inconvenience they cause the person they have called. There are yet others who, whilst in the company of others,answer phone calls and begin to casually converse with whoever has called them. Doing this is akin to turning your face away from those in your company whilst in the middle ofa conversation and engaging in conversation with someone else without any explanation or apology to the first. Such behaviour is indeed inappropriate and a reflection of crude manners.Robber of TimeThe mobile phone, whilst being a very useful item, can prove to be a robber of time too. People feel obliged to utilise the free minutes and texts they have within their contract. If one has an allowance of 500 minutes or 500 texts within his talk plan, it is not necessary to utilise all these minutes or texts. By calling people or texting them only to use up the allowance, we are wasting valuable time which could have beenutilised in productive activities.Text MessagesNowadays, many people send ‘Jumu‘ah Mubarak’ text every week to friends and associates. The contents of many of these texts are not authentic and sometimes not in line with Islamic teachings. One needs to be cautious before forwarding any message of this nature. Many people forward these messages just because they apparently sound good irrespective of the message being incorrect. Do not forward any message until you are sure of its authenticity.If you are keen to propagate the beau­tiful teachings of Islam by using the text facility then make sure it is something beneficial, correct and authentic. Moreover, the day of Jumu‘ah should not be fixed for this; any day and every day should be made mubarak by conveying a piece from the teachings of our beautiful dīn.Name at the End of TextWhenever you send a text message, it is important to write your name at the end of the text, because it is possible that the person you are texting has not saved your number on his mobile. As a result, he will be confused and inconvenienced when he receives the text due to not knowing who the sender is.In The MasjidWhen attending the masjid one should switch off his mobile. Failure to do so will result in one being disrespectful to the house of Allāh as well as being a means of disturbanceto others if the phone were to ring. It is prudent not to even leave the phone in vibration mode. In this situation if the phone were to receive a call during salāh, not only will it divert the phone owner’s attention it will also disturb the person next to him. Many people immediately after the completion of salāh check their phones for possible missed calls or messages. This shows that although one was physically standing in the court of Allāh, mentally he was elsewhere. Thus we should switch our phones off before entering the masjid and not pay attention towards them until we leave.Haram SharīfMany people would not even dream of answering a phone call whilst in the masjid when they are in their localities. However we observe the very same people freely using the mobile phone in the Haram Sharīf in Makkah and Madīnah. One should make a firm resolution and refrain from this for this leads to neglect andmany other wrongs whilst in blessed places.Musical Ring TonesWe should make sure that we have an appropriate simple ring tone on our mobile phone. To keep a musicalring tone is harām as the playing of music, or being a means of it being played is a sin. It is quite unfortunate that even when in Haramayn Sharīfayn whilst performing tawāf orpresenting salām to the Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam, the musical tones of mobile phones are heard.This is harām and a major sin. Safeguard yourself from such things that distance you from the Creator.‘Islamic’ Ring TonesThe adhān, salām, tilāwah of the Glorious Qur’ān, nāt and nashīd are used as ring tones by many on mobile phones. The adhān has a set time and a purpose and should only be announced at the time for the stipulated purpose. Salām also has a specific purpose which is to greet one another. The Glorious Qur’ ān is the word of Allāh and has been sent for guidance of mankind. The Shari’ah has stipulated many rulings in regard to this great book. Nāt and nashīd are recited to inculcate and increase the love for our beloved Prophet sallallāhu ‘alayhi wasallam in our hearts. Noneof these should be used to inform us that someone is calling us. This is disrespectful. One should merely keep a simple ring tone for this purpose.How Many Rings?If when ringing someone one finds that the phone cuts off after a few rings or diverts to an answering machine, then the caller may try again. One should retry a maximum of three times for it may be that the person was busy and as he approached the phone it stopped ringing and thus he was unable to answer. However, there are some phones that do not divert or cut-off and keep ringing. In such cases the caller should let it continue ringing for that duration which would be considered normal, approximately ten rings. If the call is not answered then put the phone down because notanswering indicates that the person is either occupied or does not wish tospeak. Do not cause inconvenience by compelling.Mobile and TeachersIt is not permissible for teachers at madrasah or school to use the mobile during their working hours for the madrasah and the school has purchased that time from them. This time does not belong to them; it has become the property of the employing establishment.Source:At-Tazkiyah– wisdom ofShaykh Muhammad Saleem Dhorat

Expressing Condolences and Sympathy

9.3 EXPRESSING CONDOLENCES AND SYMPATHYWhen offering condolences about a plight that befalls a relative, friend or acquaintance, it is kind to pray for the dead. Say a prayer similar to that reported by Muslim to have been articulated by Messenger (PBUH) to Umm Salamah (RA) at the death of her husband: ‘O Allah, forgive Abi Salamah, elevate his status among the guided people, and look afterthe family that he left behind. O Lord of the universe, forgive us and him, comfort him in his grave, and lighten his stay.’Your conversation with anguished persons should be aimed at mitigating their agony by mentioning the reward of patience, the transitory nature of life on earth, and that the Hereafter is everlasting life.In this respect, it is desirable to reiterate certain verses of the Quran, the sayings of the Prophet (PBUH) or some of the well-spoken condolences of our ancestors. You may mention the saying of Allah SWT: ‘But give glad tidings to those who patiently endure, who say, when afflicted with calamity: To Allah we belong and to Him we return. They are those on whom [descend] blessings from their Lord, and mercy,and they are the ones that receive guidance.’4 Or you may quote another verse from the Quran: ‘Every soul shall have a taste of death and only on the Day of Judgment shall you be paid your full recompense. Only those who are saved far from the fire and admitted to the Garden will have attained the object [of life], for the life of this world is but goods and chattels of deception.’ And such are Allah’s words: ‘All that is on earth will perish. But Allah will abide [for ever], the face of your Lord, most gracious, and most generous.’You may mention some of sayings of the Prophet (PBUH) reported by Muslim and others: ‘Oh Allah, reward my calamity and replace my loss with a better one.’ And like the saying of Prophet (PBUH) reported byBukhari and Muslim: ‘It is Allah’s that takes and it is He that gives, and He prescribes a certain destiny for every matter.’ Al-Bukhari and Muslim reported that when the Prophet (PBUH) mourned the death ofhis son Ibrahim he said: ‘My eyes aretearful. My heart is full of anguish, but we will say only what pleases ourLord. O Ibrahim, your loss filled us with sorrow.’ Also, it is very appropriate in this regard to use some of the traditional sayings of theMuslim forefathers. Omar bin Al-Khattab used to say: ‘Everyday we are told that so and so has just died. One day it will be said, ‘Omar has died.’ ‘ You may allude to the saying of the just Caliph Omar ibn Abdul Aziz (RA): ‘A person who is not separated from Adam by a living father, is indeed deep-rooted in death.’The honoured follower Al-Hasan Al-Basri said: ‘Oh son of Adam, you are nothing but mere days. Whenevera day passes away: a part of you passes away.’ He also said: ‘Allah ordained that the ultimate resting place of believers will be paradise, no less.’ His student Malik ibn Dinar said: ‘The wedding of the one who fears Allah, is the Day of Judgment.’ A poet said:Passing the days we are contentPassing a day brings us near the endAnother poet said:Offering condolences, we trust not living longThe manners of this religion we follow alongThe consoled and the consoling may live todayTomorrow though, they ‘ll vanish away.A suitable poem in this regard:We die and live every night and dayOne day we will die and move awayAnother poem describes how oblivious humans can be to death:Life is but a ship afloatWe think it’s still, but running is the boatI have quoted all these appropriate mourning quotations because I have witnessed many inappropriate conversations and talks by people offering sympathy. Mourning hearts are depressed with anguish and sorrow. Be sensitive and select a suitable topic for your conversation.Attempt to lift the spirits of the bereaved family. The great scholar, Mansour bin Zazan said, ‘Sorrow and sadness will increase rewards.’ Al-Hassan Al-Basri pointed out that this painful state will gradually pass away, but our sins will remain with us forever. He said, ‘Every sad anguish will diminish, except anguish over sins.’ The great scholar, Ata bin Abi Muslim pointed out that life is full of challenges and events. ‘A believer would not be happy for one complete day.’9.4 Sending Flowers and Reading Quran during FuneralsIt should be noted that many people at the death of a dear person will bring flowers and wreaths and after proceeding with the funeral, will take the flowers and wreaths to the home of the deceased. They buy the best flowers and wreaths to show their deep sympathy and concern. To do this is forbidden – whether presenting it at the funeral, accompanying the funeral with it, or bringing it to the deceased’s house. This is an imitation of non-Muslims, and is an evil innovation which should be strictly avoided. Those who do such a thing will have no reward from Allah. To the contrary, they will be questioned for such meaningless waste.Another misguided innovation during funerals is that the car that carries the deceased will broadcast, through speakers, a recording of the Holy Qur’an as if announcing the passing away of the deceased. The funeral procession should be characterized by thoughtfulness, humbleness, remembrance, reflection, awareness of Allah, and prayers for mercy. No sad music or religious chant should accompany funerals. These two rules should be followed and spread around to makeMuslims aware of the right way.A Final WordThis is a collection of Islamic manners that form the etiquette of our pious Muslim predecessors. I introduced it in a clear and understandable way so that you maypractice it. The best place to follow these manners is at your house and the houses of your brothers. Do not overlook these etiquettes when dealing with your family and your Muslim brethren.Your immediate family and friends are the most deserving of your good conduct and manners. In this regard,Bukhari and Muslim reported that a man asked the Prophet (PBUH): ‘Oh, Prophet of Allah, who deserves my best behaviour? The Prophet answered: ‘Your mother! Your mother! Your mother! Then your father, then the closer, and the closer among your relatives.’Do not overlook these manners wheninteracting with the appropriate people, and act nicely and amicably with others. If you do not behave properly, you degrade yourself, abuse the duty that you are entrusted with, and abandon the guidance of the Messenger of Allah (PBUH). Rely on Allah to attain His pleasures and the manners of His religion, for it is He who protects the virtuous people.May Allah protect you, your relatives and your beloved ones. May Allah help you obey His orders, remain obedient to Him, and follow the example of His Prophet. May Allah grant you His love, grace and His generosity. May Allah pray upon His Prophet and Messenger Muhammad,his family and his companions. All praise to Allah, the Lord of the universe. Ameen.This was written in the hope of receiving your prayers.from the book ISLAMIC MANNERSBy Shaykh Abdul-Fattaah Abu Ghuddah (RA)

Condolence

9.1 BREAKING UNPLEASANT NEWSIf you have to break the undesired news of a tragic accident, or the death of a dear or close relative or friend, break the news in such a way as to lessen its impact and to make it as mild and gentle as possible. For example, in the case of a death, you may say: ‘Recently, I learned that Mrs. X has been terribly sick, and her condition worsened. Today, I heard she has passed away. May the mercyof Allah be with her.’Start by giving the name of the person in question. Do not break the news of a death by saying, ‘Do you know who died today?’ This unduly manner frightens the listeners and prompts them to expect the worst, namely that the death involves someone who is very close to them. Instead, mention the name of the dead person before breaking the tragic news of the death. This will soften the impact of the news, reducing the listener’s apprehension,and making the news more bearable.Convey the news of fire, drowning, or car accident, etc. in a similar fashion. Prepare the listener for the news in a way that minimizes its impact. Mention the name(s) of the affected person(s) in a kind way, not a shocking way. Some people have weak hearts and such bad news may cause them to faint and collapse.If it is necessary to convey such news,choose the appropriate time. It should not take place at a meal, before going to sleep, or during an illness. Compassion and tactfulness are the best qualities you will need to handle such a situation.9.2 EXPRESSING CONDOLENCES IS A COURTESY AND A DUTYParting among loved ones is one ruleof Allah in his creations. Al-Hafiz Al-Munziri reported a Hadith, ‘Love whoever you will and you will part.’ Along this same rule, poets said:We are but guests with our families,Staying for a while, andleaving them.Wealth and families arebut trusts.Inevitably, one day trusts will be recalled.The sons of this life willall partTo meet together again in the hereafter.One wise poet listed eight stages we must all pass through. No one will bespared of these:Happiness and sorrow; gathering and parting;Difficulties and easiness; and illness and good health.Another poet saidMake perseverance your friend, and leave painful sorrowYou are not aloneEveryone lost, or will lose a loved one.If a relative or a close friend of one of your relatives or friends dies, hasten to offer your condolences. You owe your relatives, friends and Muslim brothers the moral obligation of alleviating their plight. If you can, you should attend the funeral and theburial at the cemetery. Aside from being a highly rewarding gesture of sympathy, it could be an effective andstern admonition, and a lesson reminding you of the inevitability of death.While alive, your life had lessons, reminders and admonitionToday, your death givesme the most important lessonAl-Bukhari and Muslim reported thatthe Prophet (PBUH) said: ‘A Muslim owes his Muslim brethren five gestures: returning a greeting, visiting the ill, and attending their funeral…’ Imam Ahmadreported that the Prophet said: ‘Visit the sick and follow the procession of funerals; you will remember the Hereafter.’Condolences is to alleviate the sense of grieving that confront the family ofthe deceased. This is achieved by encouraging them to be composed while trusting in Allah’s promise of great reward. Allah said in Surat Al-Baqarah ‘And give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere; who say, when afflicted with a disaster, ‘Truly! To Allah we belong and truly, to Him is our return.’ They are those on whom descend blessings and receive the mercy of their Lord, and it they who are the guided ones.’ Condolence is done by praying for the deceased to be helped and pardoned, since they will receive the benefit of such prayers. Condolence is a sincere expression of sympathy and to share the sorrow of these stressful moments. Ibn Maja and Baihaki reported, with a fair authority, a Hadith: ‘A Muslim who consoles other Muslims suffering from a calamity will be awarded a dress of dignity by Allah on the day ofJudgment.’from the book ISLAMIC MANNERSBy Shaykh Abdul-Fattaah Abu Ghuddah (RA)